High-tech spookery is a dashed difficult old business to master. One minute you're making love to a beautiful Russian ballerina/double agent, the next you're defusing a 50 megaton hydrogen bomb hidden in John Major's underpants. Golly.

This intensive three hour programme at the inventively named Spy HQ will teach you the hows, whys and wherefores of the spy game, with a panoply of gadgets and bugging gizmos thrown in for good measure.

As if that's not enough to conduct your own covert operation, you'll also learn how to use a pistol, then test your skills with quick draw techniques. You'll fire machine guns on the Close Quarter Battle Area, take aim through the powerful telescopic sight of our sniper rifles, try your skill at axe throwing, and test your nerve and concentration with a bomb de-activation challenge. Finally you'll also receive some expert instruction on un-armed combat techniques and learn contact drills using a state of the art laser combat system. Ouch.

All of which will have you applying for one of those new posts at MI5 faster than you can say John Le Carre.