There's nothing quite like the sound of Terry Wogan whispering sweet top o' the mornings in your inner ear early on a wet Wednesday in November. Nothing quite like it at all. The difficulty with Tel is, ofcourse, that he's not the best at getting one up after - what's the word for it - a heavy session.

We have scoured the globe for an answer to the seductive warmth of the duvet and the Irishman's blarney-laden charms. Something with a klaxon-like intensity. Something akin to a foghorn blast. Something that requires industrial strength ear defenders just to be around. Something with a Vanilla Ice irritation factor - but far, far worse.

Have we found it? Yes we have. This ultimate failsafe alarm for serial oversleepers produces an ear-splitting, banshee-wailing, earth-shattering 113db of white noise. In short, louder than a helicopter hovering just above one's bedroom ceiling. Golly.

Then, as aural shrapnel fills the room, this device steps up a gear. An under-mattress vibrapack delivers a seismic jolt to your nether-regions. And it won't stop a-throbbing and a-pulsing until you are out of bed and cursing the arrival of the dawn.

Job done. And, as the youth of today might put it, it's da bomb. Precisely.