Once upon a time, long before gadgets were invented, ice sculptures were all the rage on the European party circuit of the Georgian era. Flouncy ladies and all manner of cads and bounders would indulge in midsummer gaiety at grand occasions adorned by huge sculptures of rising swans or peacocks. These were hewn from solid blocks of ice preserved since winter in deep underground chambers. But they had their limitations. Now, thanks to a quantum leap in the technology of plastic injection moulding, it's possible to develop a contraption that provides visual entertainment, chills alcoholic drinks, and facilitates their consumption - all simultaneously. Enter the revolutionary Ice Luge. The luge works like so. Pour in water. Leave to set in the freezer for a few hours, or preferably overnight. Remove from freezer. Place on table. Position friend (or manservant) with bottle at top of luge. Open mouth at base of luge and request that your friend (or manservant) pours your favourite beverage into the top. Watch as the beverage tantalisingly glides down this veritable alcoholic Cresta Run, picking up a Luge Chill Factor in so doing, then slips directly into one's cake-hole.

Then simply gulp and enjoy. Wonderful and marvellous.